I’m Fine…Or Am I?

I’m fine...or am I?

But are you REALLY fine? Do you ever find yourself telling others (or yourself) that you are fine, but inside, you know that you are not actually “fine.”

There is still a stigma regarding mental health and mental illness. I find that people tend to respond to the question of "how are you" with "I'm fine" for so many reasons...and many of those reasons are NOT because they are actually doing fine:

• We are trying to fake it until we make it...if I say "I'm fine" enough times...maybe eventually I will be.

• We are afraid of how someone will treat us once they hear how we really are...will they think less of me once they know?!

• We are afraid of putting our issues onto someone else.

• We've learned to push down our feelings and not be honest with ourselves.

When we say "I'm fine" when we really are NOT okay, we are invalidating and minimizing our own feelings...and does that really help us to feel better? Probably not! Feelings are neither right nor wrong...but merely comfortable and uncomfortable (see pictures below). I want to challenge you this year to answer honestly when someone asks you "how are you?" If you are tired, say tired. If you are depressed, say depressed. If you are agitated, say agitated. If you are excited, say excited. But PLEASE, whatever you do, speak your truth and validate those feelings that are there rather than trying not to deny their existence. Feelings in our body are like a water balloon: if you don't let the water (feelings) out of the balloon (mind/body), eventually it will explode (depression, anger, anxiety, etc.). Don't let yourself explode for holding those true feelings in.